Self-Importance

“We are never so trivial as when we take ourselves seriously” – Oscar Wilde

One of the more important and challenging teachings of the Toltec Path for me was learning to let go of myself importance. Once I saw how this self concept blocked my joy and peace in the moment it became easier for me to start to let go of my pettiness and need to take everything that happened so personally.

With out even noticing, many of us have adopted a belief that everything that occurs in our life is in some way about us. With that comes the opportunity to personalize every encounter and experience we have with others and life. This is great if the place we are coming from is love. However, many of us have  unconscious fear-based beliefs and wounds  that distort our experiences and create the illusion that in some way we are being attacked or made wrong, when often it is a distorted view we are experiencing through the filters of our beliefs.

Our concept of self-importance is born from the wound of believing we are not good enough. One of the ways in which we cope with this false belief is to take a position of self importance so that others will give us the sense of self worth and importance we do not feel within our selves. This position also allows us to guard against any potential attack on our fragile facade, which is just a mask that covers up a false belief that says “you’re not good enough.”

Self-importance that comes from a place of not believing in ourselves sets us up to constantly feel offended by the acts and words of others. This then creates drama in our life and is a huge drain of our energy; it exhausts and leaves us feeling empty and angry. It keeps us away from our open heart and true self.

Self importance is just one of the many ways in which we learned to cope and get along in our life. It certainly was not anything we sought out or decided we wanted for ourselves. Yet, just like the ugly suit or dress you have in your closet, it probably seemed like a good idea at the time. Now, knowing what you know, it might be a good time to let that not so pretty dress, suit or belief go. It worked for you then but it won’t work for you now.

In our work at Soul Space we, as coaches, healers, mentors, teachers, and guides,  help people become more aware of their beliefs and how they impact every aspect of their lives without them even knowing it. We naturally observe and experience everything through the filter of our beliefs. We create our own personal reality by choice, conscious or not. Beliefs have a major effect on our performance at work, our attitudes about money and how we conduct our relationships. We are what we believe we are, true or not.

The beliefs that keep us from our true potential, our happiness, joy and fulfillment in life are what we call fear or false beliefs. These fear based beliefs are like a virus on your computer, they affect your performance in all areas of our life. We become so accustom to this low grade performance we often don’t even notice it, or when we do we chalk it up to they way things are.

If you want to change your life- right now – there is nothing more powerful than changing what you believe.